Author: Gigi

I taught middle school for 33 years and retired in 2007. I'm enjoying my journey and loving the time I have with my three granddaughters who call me "Gigi." I want to share my journey with them and with anyone else interested in sharing the lessons God has for me on this amazing journey.

You Aren’t Going to Keep That, Are You??

I never tire of watching Lillyann and Mylah interact. God showed me last night that I often share with Him the same way they share with one another. They are still learning, and so am I, the difference between giving away and lending. Mylah and I were watching “The Jungle Book” while Lillyann visited with Mere. She would hold out a little Cheerio for me and then quickly put it in her mouth if I tried to eat it. It’s a little game to her, but it’s a little game that taught an important lesson. Sometimes, if I’m quick enough, I can get that little Cheerio before she has time to snatch it back. She doesn’t like it at all when I do that and sometimes gets upset. I’m the same way with God.

When I give something to God, I find myself saying, “You aren’t going to keep that, are you?” I’m ashamed to say that I’ve let go as little Mylah and reacted with the same frustration when He does keep it. Giving things to God involves truly letting go. Mylah will offer and offer and even push a Cheerio in my mouth if I shake my head and say, “No thank you!” She wants me to want it so she can snatch it away, put it in her own mouth, and then giggle. It’s all part of her game, and I am guilty of sharing with God in the same manner.

I want to give all to God, but I don’t want Him to keep it. It’s easy to give away what I don’t want or need but harder when it’s something I want. God often gives back what I have given Him, but it is not the same. He gives my space and stuff a new dimension and does the same for me. His ways are higher than I can imagine, and I’m slowly learning to truly let go and not push my Cheerios into God’s mouth when He isn’t playing the way I want to play:)

Lillyann came home last night loaded down with goodies from her day with Mere, and she handed Mylah some things she had gotten for her. When Mylah wanted Lillyann’s precious flashlight, the atmosphere took a turn for the worse. Mere and I had to convince Lillyann that Mylah was just going to play with it for a little while. She relaxed a bit, but I could tell that she wanted to make sure she was going to get it back. Again, I saw myself in her trepidation. All worked out well when I put the little light back where it stays, and we settled in to finish the movie and “share” Cheerios:)

If God offered me the opportunity to go back to Ash Wednesday, I wouldn’t change a thing. The space and stuff I’ve given Him have made room in my heart for what He has in mind. The lessons have been hard ones, and the hurt is still healing. Learning to trust Him and walk in His kingdom in a way that glorifies Him has been, is, and will continue to be, worth the hurt that came, comes, and will always come when I share as He desires.

 

I Want Somebody to Carry Me

This morning as the girls were heading upstairs, Lillyann stopped halfway and said, “I want somebody to carry me.” She didn’t scream or fuss; she just wanted somebody to pick her up. I am the same way myself at times and could sympathize with her. Mommy encouraged her to come on up; I did the same and went down to my room. She waited for a little while, but went on up when she heard the sounds of mommy fixing breakfast and Mylah calling, “La La?” Getting stuck in the middle is not the same as finding the center:) Lillyann forgot all about being stuck when she heard the love up above. God’s sweet voice has the same effect upon me when I find myself in between and wanting Him to carry me.

The middle child knows all too well what being stuck in the middle means, and the middle-school student knows it even more clearly. As a middle child who taught middle school for thirty-three years, it is a feeling that I have to make sure doesn’t define me. The center represents balance, but the middle means in between. They are so alike, but so very different!! Middle children, myself included, have the tendency to mediate. Older and younger children might call it meddling:)

Like Lillyann on the stairs this morning, I want to be carried when I find myself stuck in between where I’ve been and where I’m going. Walking in God’s kingdom is a spiraling upward process, and there are times when I need a nudge. There are other times when fear forces me to stop and cry out. Christ will carry me when I cannot go on alone. If Lillyann had truly needed to be carried, both Gina and I would have come running; but we both know better than to help when she needs to go on her own. Christ knows the same about me. If we are carried all the time, we would lose the ability to walk at all. Good intentions often cripple those we think we are helping. God knows I must find His way before I can move nearer to Him and to those in my path. He provides the Holy Spirit and Christ’s precious love as guides on my journey and gives me just what I need just when I need it. I love that about Him.

Lillyann scooted quickly up the steps this morning when we left her alone, and the sweet sounds of playing together soon filled my heart. There’s nothing I enjoy more! God feels the same way when He sees His children moving forward and finding fellowship with one another. The sound of love is the sweetest sound in this world, and I know it is just a tiny taste of the love I’ll hear in heaven. As those sounds upstairs spurred Lillyann upward, so do the sounds of heaven spur me on when I find myself stuck. Walking in God’s kingdom is about learning, and the most powerful lessons are those I learn when stuck on the stairs:)

An Out of Body Experience

Walking in God’s kingdom is an out of body experience that requires the faith to go when I do not see and do what I do not understand. 2 Corinthians 5:6-10 says it powerfully.

“Therefore, being always of good courage, and knowing that while we are at home in the body we are absent from the Lord— for we walk by faith, not by sight—we are of good courage, I say, and prefer rather to be absent from the body and to be at home with the Lord. Therefore we also have as our ambition, whether at home or absent, to be pleasing to Him. For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may be recompensed for his deeds in the body, according to what he has done, whether good or bad.” NASB

My body gets me into trouble when I get too comfortable in it. These verses and the ones that follow were at the heart of the message at Jack Lyday’s funeral yesterday. He was a believer with tremendous faith. 2 Corinthians 4:16-18 addresses such faith.

“Therefore we do not lose heart, but though our outer man is decaying, yet our inner man is being renewed day by day. For momentary, light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory far beyond all comparison, while we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen; for the things which are seen are temporal, but the things which are not seen are eternal.”NASB

I lose heart if I focus upon this temporary vessel, but I can experience beautiful glory beyond all comparison if I gaze at my beautiful Savior and remember that it’s His temple and not my own. Walking in God’s kingdom requires faith, and I cannot get out of this body without it. I found yesterday that I couldn’t think of Jack without grinning, and I know he would appreciate that. In fact, I could see his amazing smile as I heard God’s sweet Word read. Pastor John reminded me that Jack told everyone he met that he was a believer, and he always said it with a glorious grin. He walked his life in God’s kingdom and trusted God with powerful faith that others saw clearly. If I do the same, I can smile as Jack always did, especially when I talk about my beloved Savior.

Being absent from the body isn’t easy, and I slip back into it often. Like a favorite shirt or pair of shoes, it bids me to relax and stop this out of body nonsense. My body isn’t the only one who feels more comfortable when I stay in it. Some insist that I stop my folly and get back where I belong! Staying in the body is easy and makes everyone comfortable. Well, everyone but God, and He’s the only one I want to please. I love being present with Him. God’s presence trumps any pleasure or escape I get from staying in this body. I think I’ll just keep on listening to Him and walk in His kingdom with the grin full of the glory God’s presence gives me now and will give me even more when I am one with Him in heaven. I know God and Dot had a glory-filled grin when Jack joined them. I look forward to seeing God’s grin myself one day. Until then, I plan to stay out of this body as much as possible and focus upon pleasing God and God alone.

Surrendered and Surrounded:)

Before heading to dinner last night, I decided to take some photos since it was a special occasion. I told the girls I wanted to hold them one at a time for a picture with Gigi. Of course, they both wanted up at the same time. Tyler and Gina can handle both at once, but I’m not quite there. I was holding Lillyann, and little Mylah wanted in on the action too. I told Gina to hand her to me quickly and not get very far away as Tyler took the picture. The girls giggled, and I strained; but their sweet hugs gave me strength. Love enables me to do what I don’t believe possible:) God is love, and He makes all things possible. The love I give and receive changes me in powerful ways. Walking in God’s kingdom is walking in love, and I’m finding that allows me to do the impossible.

Philippians 4:13 is a favorite verse of mine, and God placed it in my path this morning as I thought of how I’ve changed over the past two months. “I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.” (NASB) I refer to that verse when I fear I won’t be able to what God is asking me to do, but I am beginning to see it as a call to accept the love and help He offers through Christ and the Holy Spirit. God’s love manifests through His Son and His Spirit, and I have access to its power when I accept the love He offers and let Him surround me. Love is the key to walking in God’s kingdom, and His love allows me to walk without having to understand, to trust without having doubts, and to find the sweet joy that comes from surrendering completely to His will.

When I surrender to His will, His love surrounds me in the most beautiful way. I love it when Lilly and Mylah both hug me at the same time. They are a big part of the beautiful love God has placed in my life as I walk in His kingdom and love as He desires. It’s been a tough time of transition for me as I’ve come out of my comfort zone, let go of my desires, and embraced His will; but the joy I’ve found has been worth it. God won’t surround me with His love until I surrender and trust Him completely. God used the girls as a sweet reminder that all things are possible when I allow Christ’s precious love to surround me. It a simply magical feeling, and I love every moment:)

Surrounded

Love Shared is Love Squared:)

Thirty-three years ago today, my son Tyler was born. My students at Alarka Elementary were giving me a baby shower when I realized he was on his way. Tyler wasn’t due for another two weeks, but he and God had different plans. Emily Harris was the school nurse, and she told me that I was, in fact, in labor. Shirley Loftis began timing my contractions and whispering ‘Jesus’ after each one:) I continued to party with my students and ignored the worried looks from my colleagues.

I learned an important lesson in cockiness that day as I told those around me that the pains were barely noticeable. I was sure it was going to be an easy delivery. Around ten o’clock, Mrs. Harris was told me that I needed to get to the hospital. Shirley told me the contractions were coming every five minutes, so I went to tell Mr. White that I needed to leave. He agreed wholeheartedly and urged me to leave immediately. Lawana Almond took me to my doctor’s office, and the wait began.

Dr. Han was calm and said he wanted to keep me at his office as long as possible. At noon, my water broke, so we all went to the hospital. My contractions were one minute apart and very intense. I knew it would be over soon and just kept on breathing. Billy and I had gone through Lamaze classes, so we knew the drill and prepared to get this baby into the world. He told me when the contractions were coming, and I did the breathing exercises as prescribed. I also learned a powerful lesson in knowing what to do and actually doing it which always applies beautifully to walking in God’s kingdom:)

Tyler was a big, strong baby who weighed an ounce shy of nine pounds. He was anxious to get here, so he pushed up and over the birth canal. His was out of position and struggled to no avail to get free. Dr. Han reached in and repositioned him just as God repositions me when I get ahead of myself:) At eight o’clock, Dr. Han convinced me to have an epidural for the pain, and at 10:10 pm on Friday, April 18, 1980, Tyler Proctor joined my journey. He was screaming loudly but stopped immediately when he heard my voice. It was humbling to watch his little eyes try to focus as he looked toward me, and I think of that moment when I know God is there but have trouble seeing Him. I am reassured by His voice and His presence as Tyler was with mine. Dr. Han placed Tyler on my stomach, and he stared and listened intently. Again, I think of God when I recall that moment because it is when I began to understand His love for me. I was taking part in God’s creation, and He used my precious son to take love to a new level.

I thank God every day for my sweet son and the girls he loves so dearly. I share my journey with his daughters in mind, so it’s important to let them know how their daddy came into this world. Last night, as I watched him and Gina playing and squealing with the little girls they both adore, my heart just melted. Mama told me once there was nothing better than a grandchild. I told her there was no way I could love anyone more than Tyler, but she grinned and told me to just wait. She was right, as usual, and I love Lillyann and Mylah more than I thought possible. My love for Tyler grows as I watch him love his beautiful girls and watch them love him right back. Gina is a daughter to me; I love her dearly and refer to her as my daughter-in-love. They surround me with love and have taught me that love shared is love squared:)

Love Squared

Lord, Help My Time!!

There are many definitions for the verb help, but the words of Jesus in Acts 20:34-36 offer a beautiful explanation.

“You yourselves know that these hands ministered to my own needs and to the men who were with me. In everything I showed you that by working hard in this manner you must help the weak and remember the words of the Lord Jesus, that He Himself said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’ When he had said these things, he knelt down and prayed with them all.” NASB

Webster defines help as: “to give assistance or support to, to make more pleasant or bearable, to be of use to, to further the advancement of, to change for the better, to refrain from, to keep from occurring, to restrain (oneself) from doing something, to serve with food or drink, to appropriate something for oneself, give assistance or support, to be of use or benefit.” God placed the word in my path today and reminded that there are many ways to help as I walk in His kingdom. 

Help can mean refraining from or restraining myself from doing something that will hurt me or others. It’s easier to jump in and save someone than to restrain myself when frustrated. It’s easier to give advice than refrain from talking and simply listen. It’s easier to appropriate something for myself rather than give it to others. I blame Satan when I just can’t help myself. The devil made me do it covers a multitude of sins:)

Mama used to say, “Lord! Help my time!!” when she was frustrated. She knew she needed help in restraining and refraining, so she said that instead of the more colorful expressions daddy used. I only heard mama curse once, and we all burst out laughing as she told a rude lady what she thought of the way she was behaving. It was a beautiful example of alliterating the letter b:) 

“God is our refuge and strength,
A very present help in trouble.” NASBPsalm 46:1 is a favorite verse, so I had pens made for my middle school classroom with the verse inscribed on them. I figured if the students were going to steal my pens, I’d put a helpful verse on them. The students didn’t steal a single one, but I did give them all away:) I learned a great lesson in helping from those pens. God’s ways are much higher than mine.

Sometimes, helping is cleaning up messes I don’t want to clean up, and I thought of mama today when the girls and I went upstairs for lunch. Cookie had gotten into the garbage and spread it around the living room. If the girls hadn’t been with me, I would have used some of daddy’s expressions when I saw the chewed up dirty diaper. I went with, “Lord!! Help my time!!” instead. The lesson today was that others are watching when I help, so I need to make sure I help with a loving attitude. Living with dogs in the house is a challenge, but I know God will use them to teach me. I’m not sure at this point what those lessons might be. I did learn that loving, giving, and helping sometimes involve doing things that are not pleasant or comfortable, and it’s never fun to clean up messes, especially when I didn’t make them in the first place:)

Whether it’s restraining, refraining, not helping myself to what isn’t mine, or loving and giving to others as He desires, God is faithful to teach me how to help as He desires. I’m learning to listen and not question; but when Cookie started barking and woke Lillyann from her nap, I’m afraid I did whisper one of daddy’s words when I went up to tell him to be quiet. I never said I was a saint:)

All I can say is that Cookie better be glad he’s adorable:)

Cookie & Lilly

From Premises to Promises

Premises is only a letter away from promises, but there is a world of difference between the two. The definitions for premises are:

“land and buildings; a piece of land and the buildings on it; part or all of building; a building or part of a building, especially when used for commercial purposes; matters previously mentioned; matters previously stated or referred to in a legal document such as a deed.”

I’ve depended upon premises far more than promises in my life, but I’m learning that God’s promises pave the path in His kingdom. Walking in God’s kingdom is walking on those sweet promises in a way that changes everything. God’s promises are the heart of His Word, and here are a few favorites that bless me:

2 Peter 1:4 (NASB)

“For by these He has granted to us His precious and magnificent promises, so that by them you may become partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world by lust.”

Jeremiah 29:11 (NASB)

“For I know the plans that I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope.”

Matthew 11:28-29 (NASB)

“Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

Isaiah 40:29-31 (NASB)

“He gives strength to the weary,
 And to him who lacks might He increases power. Though youths grow weary and tired,
 And vigorous young men stumble badly, Yet those who wait for the Lord 
Will gain new strength;
 They will mount up with wings like eagles,
 They will run and not get tired, They will walk and not become weary.”

Philippians 4:19 (NASB)

“And my God will supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus.”

Romans 8:37-39 (NASB)

“But in all these things we overwhelmingly conquer through Him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

Proverbs 1:33 (NASB)

“But he who listens to me shall live securely
 And will be at ease from the dread of evil.”

John 14:27 (NASB)

“Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful.”

Romans 10:9 (NASB)

“that if you confess with your mouth Jesus as Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved;

Romans 6:23 (NASB)

“For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

There are many more promises in God’s Word, and they each give me the strength and courage to walk in His kingdom with a new vigor knowing that the road upon which I walk has been paved and sealed with Christ’s precious love. His love fulfills God’s promises in a way that allows me to enter His kingdom and walk with the assurance that His promises never fail.

I can stray from the path or turn around if I chose; but if I follow Christ’s voice of love and stay on the path He’s prepared, God will take me where I cannot go alone. He does not promise that the path will be easy, but He does promise that it will lead to joy if I obey and keep on walking even when I can’t see or don’t understand where He’s taking me. He gives me a great Guide in the Holy Spirit and faithful friends to hear my heart and share the journey:)

God’s kingdom now isn’t a field of flowers or a lush tropical paradise. God’s kingdom is a beautiful field ripe and ready to be harvested. When I’m ripe and ready myself, I can begin to walk in a way that helps with His harvest.

“And He was saying to them, ‘The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few; therefore beseech the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into His harvest.'” Luke 10:2 NASB

God's Harvest

Following the Voice of Love

The world gets very loud and can make discerning difficult. But even in a noisy din, the voice of a loved one is clear. My heart helps me hear my loved ones when the world gets in the way. I have felt the fear of being separated from a loved one and the joy hearing their voice brings. “Hear” is a big part of the word heart, and hearing is at the heart of love. It is also at the heart of John 10:27-30.

“My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me; and I give eternal life to them, and they will never perish; and no one will snatch them out of My hand. My Father, who has given them to Me, is greater than all; and no one is able to snatch them out of the Father’s hand. I and the Father are one.” NASB

The point of hearing the shepherd’s voice is following the shepherd’s heart. Jesus says that His sheep know His voice and they follow Him. He adds that those sheep were given to Him by His Father, and no one is able to take them from Him. Jesus is talking about connectedness, and it gets Jesus into trouble as He makes it clear that He is One with God. That isn’t what the crowd wants to hear.

The voice of my sweet Savior bids me to follow and love as He loves. It calms my heart and stills my soul in the same way mama’s voice always did. Christ’s voice gives me the courage to follow Him even when I don’t know where He’s leading me. I don’t have to know; I just have to believe that He is Who He says He is. Jesus makes that very clear as He challenges those who would stone Him to death.

“If I do not do the works of My Father, do not believe Me; but if I do them, though you do not believe Me, believe the works, so that you may know and understand that the Father is in Me, and I in the Father.” John 20:37-38 NASB

Jesus challenges me in the same way. If I believe He is who He says He is, then I need to hear His voice and follow Him. Walking in God’s kingdom means following His Son. I have to let Jesus go before me, and that means being patient and not having to know where I’m going. I only have to know Who I’m following. Walking in God’s kingdom doesn’t make sense to the world, and sometimes it doesn’t make sense to me either. That’s where trust comes in. I know my Shepherd’s voice, and I rest assured in His promise that no one can snatch me out of His hands. His is a voice of love, hope, and peace that allows me to be one with Him and with God.

Today would be mama’s 97th birthday. Her voice of love still sings in my heart, and I still feel the love and safety of her embrace. I thank God for mama and know she will be celebrating with Him today as she does every day:)

Jesus, My Good Shepherd

The Shepherd's Hands

From Hunger to Hope

One of the best benefits of living with my son and his sweet family is feeding the girls. They love to eat and delight in food as we all should. The sounds coming from their little table feed my soul and encourage me to keep on cooking. The same should be true when we go to worship. God’s messengers take His Word and prepare a message much in the same way a cook prepares a meal. The raw material is all from God, just as the food is from the grocery store. What is done with it makes the message and the meal a delight or a miserable experience. I know His messengers must feel the joy I feel when the message is received in the same way those sweet little girls eat the meals I prepare for them:)

I am fortunate to have many friends who serve God’s Word faithfully each and every week. What a blessing to be surrrounded by such love. Both messages and meals must start with love as their main ingredient. I know that’s why the girls giggle and make sweet sounds of delight as they eat, and I know it is why I am so blessed by the messages God places in my path. If I prepared the exact same meals and forced them eat every bite, I don’t think I’d hear the same sounds:) The same is true for those messages. In my lifetime, I’ve heard some messages that left me feeling overstuffed or empty, but I am fortunate to be well fed when it comes to messages now. I’m eating in God’s kingdom in a wonderful way! The challenge in preparing and delivering a message or a meal is making sure that those you serve are filled and feeling better when they get up from the table.

God’s table is like all tables, and messages delivered by faithful servants sate my appetite for God’s Word and make me want even more. I could go to the restaurants of world reknown chefs and write down all the ingredients for their famous dishes, but I doubt I could come up with the same wonderful presentation. It isn’t about trying to be like a chef or minister I enjoy. It is about being inspired. When I come away from a powerful message, it makes me want to go to God’s Word and dig in myself. When I eat an amazing meal, I want to go to my own kitchen and experiment. It’s the feeling I pray we all take with us as we come away from a Sunday morning message. A good message, like a good meal, leaves me with the desire for more.

“He said to him the third time, “Simon, son of Jonah,do you love Me?” Peter was grieved because He said to him the third time, “Do you love Me?”And he said to Him, “Lord, You know all things; You know that I love You.” Jesus said to him, “Feed My sheep.” KJV

Jesus tells Peter to feed His sheep, and that is what we all must do. If I only ate on Wednesdays and Sundays, I couldn’t make it through the week. The same is true when it comes to God’s Word. His messengers prepare special meals for me every week, and I thank God for all of them. I listen to podcasts and watch live stream throughout the week, but more importantly, I’m inspired to get my Bible off the shelf and feed on God’s Word myself. I love worshipping with others for the same reason I love eating with others. I love others:) I also like to have alone time with God and feed upon His Word with Him. A dinner for two is also very important to schedule!

Enjoy God’s Word today and everyday and make sure that you spend time listening to God’s messengers with fellow believers by your side. Take what is offered in love with love, and you will be beautifully filled. Come like a food critic to analyze and find fault, and you will miss eating in His kingdom now. Come and complain because it isn’t what you wanted, and you will miss eating in His kingdom now. Come and focus on the music playing or church décor, and you will miss eating in His kingdom now. Come and leave because someone is there with whom you will not eat, and you’ll miss eating in His kingdom now. Come eagerly anticipating what’s coming and enjoy eating in His kingdom now! Come thankful to see others there and enjoy eating in His kingdom now! Come and let the music complement the message and enjoy eating in His kingdom now! Come wondering how the beautiful Word of God will be served today and enjoy eating in His kingdom now!

How we come to the table makes all the difference in His Word. I can’t wait to see all God has in store for me today and everyday. His Word is the finest fare in His world, and I know He delights as His faithful messengers serve it up in ways that glorify Him and feed His sheep. The world is starving for His Word, so I thank all those who spend the week preparing their hearts to serve His Word in a way that turns the world’s hunger in hope. 

Joy Comes in the Morning:)

“Weeping may last for the night,
 But a shout of joy comes in the morning.” (NASB)

Psalm 30:5 reminds me that God knows what’s best for me and will watch me pitch a fit or sniff sadly when I don’t get my way, but He will not give me what I want when I want it. I needed the reminder last night as Lillyann pitched a wailing fit for mommy in the middle of the night. I was frustrated by my inability to console her, and poor little Mylah just watched quietly.

God promises to be with me always, but He doesn’t promise to give me what I want. I’m sure it hurts Him to see me suffer, but He sees the joy that’s coming and knows the hurt will be greater if He succumbs to my wails. The shout of joy that comes from obedience is filled with thanksgiving when I come through the tough times and understand the lesson He has for me.  I always get something much better that what I wanted.

The problem with getting what I want is that it is never enough. If God gave in to my every whim and want, I would only find something else I had to have:) He’s a patient, loving parent who is willing to listen to my weeping and whining because He hears the shout of joy coming in the morning if I will trust and obey Him. Storms, like tantrums, come when two fronts collide. The worst storm fades and is soon forgotten as I look at the light and breathe in the fresh air after a storm. I love Psalm 30:5, and I find hope in the joy God promises in the middle of a stormy night of weeping.

Joy and God’s peace are far better than happiness and easy peace. God knows that better than anyone; He lived it out as His Son walked in His kingdom here. Christ cried out to Him on the cross, but God could see the joy that was coming on the morning of His resurrection. Christ chose to be obedient to the point of death, and the shout of joy when He rose is still being heard around the world:) I am eternally grateful and look to His example when it comes to obeying.

There is someone who delights in spoiling me. Satan tells me what I want to hear, gives me just what I want, and constantly tells me I’m right. That brings easy peace, but never satisfaction. The spoiled child will always yearn for the joy and satisfaction they will never find without obedience. It is a sad, unfulfilled life. Unlike earthly parents, God is able to give me everything I want, but He loves me far too much to do that.

I’ve learned to pray for His desires to become mine and for God to please not give me what I want! It is the cry behind the screams of every spoiled child. We are all working together to help Lillyann and Mylah learn to share and understand they cannot always have what they want. It’s not easy or popular, but we want them to have the joy that will come in the morning:)