Category: Bible

Tummy or Heart ??

Lilly and Mylah have an ongoing debate that reflects religious debates found in the world. Lilly pointed to her chest one day and said that God was in her heart. Mylah pointed at her round little belly and said God was in her tummy. I don’t believe she meant to start a debate, but she did. Lilly jumped in to say that God was not in her tummy; He was in her heart!!

Mylah defended her beliefs, as only a two-year-old can, and insisted God was in her tummy, not her heart!  I told the girls they were both right. God was in our hearts, tummies, feet, arms, heads, and anywhere else He wanted to be. They settled down to dinner, but the argument resurfaced several times during the next few days.

I kept Mylah on Thursday and Friday, and she revisited the subject as we settled into bed on Thursday evening. She likes to play with my hair while she’s drifting off to sleep, and she was twisting and turning it with vigor after we read her new library book. I detached myself from her grip, turned off the light, and snuggled next to her. She said quietly, “God IS in my tummy.” I told her I knew He was, and she said she wanted Him to stay there. She was looking for an ally in the debate with her older sister. I told her again that God could be anywhere He wanted to be, and she drifted off to sleep.

Christians in this world are just like Lilly and Mylah when it comes to details, doctrines, and denominations. I’m right; you’re wrong. I know God better than you do. God’s on my side! God is this! God is that! The girls little arguent was cute, but similar exchanges between adults are not so endearing. They irritate and leave me wondering, “What ever happened to love one another?” If we would put as much effort into loving God and loving our neighbors as we do into arguing about Him, the world would see a new dynamic that would make them to want a loving relationship with God instead of a place to hide from His fighting children.

The trouble with doctrines and denominations is that they replace relationship. I am amazed at the venom and violence that grow from the lines we draw around God. I suppose it’s human nature to want to corner the market on God, but Christ came to change our nature. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we allowed God to be who and where He wants rather than who and where we want Him? Conflict over creeds will exist as long as there are two churches standing in this world.  Heaven is a place of unity and peace, and I do wish the same were true of the body of Christ.

God is love, and walking in His kingdom is about loving one another in a way that makes the world see the disciples Jesus describes in John 13:35.

“Let me give you a new command: Love one another. In the same way I loved you, you love one another. This is how everyone will recognize that you are my disciples—when they see the love you have for each other.” (The Message)

Love changes everything if given the chance 🙂

Escape or Rescue?

Getting Off the Coaster

I was caught up in the roller coaster rescue last week because I’ve always been afraid of getting stuck on one. God used the image of riders hanging for five hours in a sharp turn far above the ground to help me see my heart was in a very similar predicament.

I can’t scream loudly enough to stop a roller coaster if I want off. I can easily catch the attention of the person controlling the Merry-Go-Round and get off; but the noise and excitement of a roller coaster drown out any pleas for help, so I’m stuck until the ride stops.

Five hours seems like a long time to be suspended in the air on a hot summer day, but God reminded me that it’s much worse for my heart to be left hanging by a thread. My heart broke when I heard Robin Williams committed suicide last night.  I imagine he simply saw it as a way to escape. I’ve been tempted to escape myself rather than allowing God to rescue my heart.

Pain will always come with living and loving, and no one understands that better than God. My heart stopped in a very dangerous curve this weekend, and I found myself screaming for the ride to stop and for someone to get me off the roller coaster. God bid me to take His hand and trust Him to rescue my heart.

What’s great for a carnival ride isn’t necessarily great for a heart. The word carnival gets its meaning from the 1540’s when folks would make merry before Lent. It literally means “flesh, farewell.” Staying on the coaster is staying in the flesh and enjoying the thrill that comes from all those unnatural highs and lows that come with the flesh. Spirit offers a very different high which lasts longer and is much stronger than the flesh. God made it clear that the ride He has in mind for my heart is much better than anything I can imagine on my own, and His rescues are always better than my escape plans.

I know it will take some time for my heart to make the transition God desires, but I also know His transformation will be just what my heart needs. While my heart heals, I plan to keep the promise He makes in Psalm 30:5 very near my heart.

“weeping may stay for the night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.” NIV

 

Offer Up the Ordinary

I’ve been studying Romans 12 this week, and I love the way Eugene Peterson translates verses one and two in The Message.

“So here’s what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.”

I love the idea of offering my ordinary life to God. My “sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking around life” is virtually all of my life. When I think about how much of my life is ordinary, I’m humbled by these verses. I love gathering for worship or doing something special, but I realized today that my relationship with God or with anyone is rooted in loving them in ordinary ways.

The kids went off on an adventure, so I was home alone today. I was feeling left out and a little sad at first, but I thought about Romans 12 and decided to be grateful for an ordinary day and give it to God. It was a quiet day filled with peace. Some might call it boring, but I found it to be a beautiful blessing. I swam alone, walked alone, ate alone, and read alone. It was wonderful!

God taught an important lesson today as I realized there are far worse things than being alone. It was nice to have my attention fixed upon God. I was able to see and hear things I don’t notice when busyness surrounds me. The birds, frogs, crickets, and the doggies were great company today. I felt the stress and the mess melt away with each chirp and croak. It was so freeing to relax and let go. I gave God my attention, and He bid me to stop and enjoy what I miss when I’m getting and doing.

Being part of Christ’s body is about being who I’m meant to be. Trying to be something I’m not or comparing myself with others causes me to miss the simple beauty of simply being. God gave me something extraordinary today, and that’s what He will do everyday if I’ll fix my attention on Him and offer Him my ordinary.

The Rose of Sharon

The Rose of Sharon
The Rose of Sharon

“I am the rose of Sharon, The lily of the valleys.”Song of Solomon 2:1 NASB

I haven’t spent much time in The Song of Solomon, but God used a beautiful flower to draw my attention to chapter two today. Solomon’s open intimacy always makes me blush because I feel as if I’m reading someone else’s love letter or spying on two lovers.

After studying hard all morning, I went to the garden to relax for a moment. The warm sun and gentle breeze embraced me as I talked to God about things that were on my heart.

I’ve always been close to God, but His presence was more powerful than ever as I looked at the rose of Sharon bushes blowing in the breeze and listened to the water flowing in the fountain. He took my breath away!

It reminded me of a time decades ago when our love was brand new. God made it clear that He missed the intimacy we once shared. I wasn’t sure what to think about that, but I couldn’t turn away.

Christ is the rose of Sharon and loves me more than I can begin to imagine. The image of God wanting and waiting for me was embarrassing. How in the world could my Creator be enamored with me? He didn’t let up, so I simply sat in awe of His majesty and soaked in His love.

When I came home, I went to The Song of Solomon and read chapter two hoping to recreate the feeling I had in the garden. It was embarrassing. Again, how could God love me that way? I read it until I believed the beautiful song was meant for me.

Solomon knew God’s love, and his father David was a man after God’s own heart. Both men understood the intimacy God desires, and both describe that love in their songs. I went away from the garden with an exquisite sense of love that Solomon captures beautifully in his song. The level of intimacy he describes takes my heart out of its comfort zone because the level of love God desires does just that.

God wants me to understand the depth of His love, and Solomon’s image of a bride and groom admiring one another did that for me today. Christ loves like a groom longing for His bride. Like any groom, He hopes His bride will feel the same way about Him.

The beauty of my time in the garden with God today was being as vulnerable as I’ve ever been in my life. In that moment of openness, I knew I was loved and cherished as only a bride can be. I finally saw myself as the bride God bids me to be. There aren’t words to describe how that affected my heart. Suffice it to say that I’m not who I was, but I am who God created me to be. I’m thankful I was in that beautiful moment long enough to know that I can never settle for less again.

I took a bloom from that Rose of Sharon bush and decided to press it so I could keep it as a reminder of God’s lessons today. I opened the heavy Impressionist art book by my television and had to laugh out loud when I saw my baby picture smiling up at me. I put it in the book because, like my heart, it needed a little smoothing out.

I marvel at God’s ways and love the how He uses images to get His lessons across to me. The smiling baby me was a powerful image that reminded me God has always loved me and always will. I pray my love for Him will always be like the bride in The Song of Solomon. He deserves the very best when it comes to love, and so do I 🙂

Baby Gigi

Love + Grace = Peace

Love is the first step in finding peace. As incomprehensible as God’s love is, it is the beginning of everything and must be the place from which my heart starts its journey toward peace. Grace enters into the journey in the life of Christ. God became one of us and extended grace to a world in need of connection.

Grace became the glue that connected God’s love and the Holy Spirit’s peace in our hearts. Christ made that connection possible when He died and rose from the grave in the most amazing plan ever. Grace is more than amazing; it is more than any word we have in our vocabularies. It is what brings love and peace together. Just as the Trinity are three and one, so are love, grace and peace beautifully connected. They do not exist apart from one another, but they are three separate entities.

I don’t pretend to understand the Trinity, but I feel Its effect upon my life. I can’t define love, grace, or peace; but I know what they do to my heart. I cannot imagine life without the love of God, the grace of Christ, or the peace of the Holy Spirit. I know when my heart is out of balance it is because I allow other than love, grace, and peace to be present in it. Love, grace, and peace will step aside when hate, lust, or discord enter in. They will not share or force their way into my heart’s space.

The beauty of love, grace, and peace is that they create a beautiful harmony that cannot be found anywhere except in a heart tuned to them. Hearts can find love and peace for brief periods, but without the grace Christ offers, it is only a temporary possession that dissipates quickly and must be sought over and over again. Christ’s grace provides a sweet Comforter in the Holy Spirit who coexists with me. There is a world of difference between possessing and coexisting, and as big a difference between the peace I can find on my own and the peace Christ’s grace brings. The peace of the Holy Spirit is like having a beautiful friend who hears my heart and never leaves my side. Peace that possesses is a temporary high that feels good for a moment and then goes away.

My peace is disrupted when I allow my desires to override God’s will. God is all powerful, but He will not force His love, His Son’s grace, or His Spirit’s peace upon anyone. He knows I must experience discord occasionally to appreciate the difference His peace offers. Last week, I got carried away with my selfish wants and found myself floundering and flustered. I know prayer is the path to peace, so I did a lot of praying. What happened is what always happens when I get tired of spinning out of control and ask God to help. He extended love and grace, and I surrendered to His peace.

There is no verse more comforting to me than the sweet simple words of Philippians 4:7

“And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (NASB)

I suppose I will veer off the path of peace as long as I live, but it comforts my heart greatly to know that peace is only a prayer away. Now, if I can only get better at praying a little faster each time 🙂

The Journey’s Ups & Downs

The Top of the World!
The Top of the World!

While having lunch with friends this week, the waitress spilled a large glass of ice water on the floor beside me. It made a loud noise, so she was the center of attention for an awkward moment. I told her it was okay, and she smiled; but I know she wanted to crawl into a corner. That’s what awkward moments do to all of us. I am painfully familiar with awkward moments and have had far more than my share, so I learned at an early age to make the best of them. I quickly made fun of myself before anyone else had the chance or let Pollyanna make lemonade from the lemons life threw at me. 

The water from that overturned glass immediately disappeared into the carpet, and the ice quickly melted away. No harm was done, and life went back to normal. As I looked at the wet carpet, I couldn’t help but wish the same were true in matters of the heart. Once it’s broken or poured out, life can never be the same. That’s a good thing, but it’s a painful mess for a while. Each bump, break, spill, or near miss strengthens my heart and brings me nearer to God. He knows brokenness and emptiness enable my heart to climb or come down from the summits on this journey. It’s human nature to want to quit when my heart is hurting, but I’m learning that giving up doesn’t have to follow giving out. Christ will help when the burden is more than I can bear. 

Pride tells me to quit, but love bids me to reach out for help. It’s good to do what I can on my own, but it’s better to let love lead me to a place of accepting help when I need it. If I don’t, I’ll give up each time I give out. No one would attempt Mount Everest without an experienced sherpa, but many walk through life afraid to ask for help. Walking in God’s kingdom is more challenging and takes far longer than a trip up the mountain, so He gives a beautiful Guide to help us along the way.

Reaching the summit isn’t for the faint of heart because as soon as the view takes my breath away, I’m left with the prospect of going back down. That’s a more daunting and more dangerous journey than the climb upward. God reminded me in His lessons this week that ups and downs are part of the journey, and I must get used to them if I want to live and love as He desires. The beauty of being at the bottom is knowing there is no where to go but up. My favorite Psalm of Ascent is 121. I cannot look to the mountain when I am standing on top of it. I am invincible on the summit, and I forget I need help. That is the most dangerous place for my heart to be. Whether I come down carefully or in one fell swoop like the water in that glass, I am in the perfect position for remembering from whence comes my help.

“I will lift up my eyes to the mountains;
From where shall my help come?
My help comes from the Lord,
Who made heaven and earth.
He will not allow your foot to slip;
He who keeps you will not slumber.
Behold, He who keeps Israel
Will neither slumber nor sleep.

The Lord is your keeper;
The Lord is your shade on your right hand.
The sun will not smite you by day,
Nor the moon by night.
The Lord will protect you from all evil;
He will keep your soul.
The Lord will guard your going out and your coming in
From this time forth and forever.”

God guards my going out and coming in and my going up and coming down. The journey will always have its ups and downs, but I take sweet comfort in knowing that Christ left a great Guide to help in both.

The beauty of the summit.

Looking at the summit. (Beijing 2008 Olympic Games)

You Do the Math

You Do the MathI prefer solving equations to balancing books; God used both in His lessons this week. I love math, but the expression “You do the math” is more about figuring out the obvious than actually doing any math. I may be a whiz when it comes to equations, but I’m horrible at “doing the math.” Constants, coefficients, variables, and operators make sense to me, but they don’t apply to my heart. There is no logic in love, but there are constants that apply.

Romans 13:8-10 says “You do the math” very effectively.

“Don’t run up debts, except for the huge debt of love you owe each other. When you love others, you complete what the law has been after all along. The law code—don’t sleep with another person’s spouse, don’t take someone’s life, don’t take what isn’t yours, don’t always be wanting what you don’t have, and any other “don’t” you can think of—finally adds up to this: Love other people as well as you do yourself. You can’t go wrong when you love others. When you add up everything in the law code, the sum total is love.” (The Message)

The sum total of God’s Word is love, and Christ gave us all the answer to God’s equation before asking us to do the math. In Algebra, the answer is given before I start, so I’ll know where I’m going. The same is true with God because the process of working out problems is the whole point of our journey. I struggle with the obvious and understand the difficult, so doing the math isn’t easy for me. God knows that better than anyone and used it well this week.

I can’t make an answer be what I want it to be in math or in life. No matter how many times I try to convince myself or God that I am right, He patiently waits for me to see and correct my mistakes. Sometimes, I smile and see how silly my mistakes are and quickly fix them; more often, I cry in frustration, wad my heart up, and toss it back at Him. He picks it up, smooths it out, and gently waits until I’m ready to begin again.

There is but one answer when it comes to any heart problem, and that is love. Love is amazing, and I can’t go wrong when I love others. Love doesn’t mean I can break the rules and laws God gives when it comes to loving. I can’t make up my own rules or skip the ones I don’t like. I have to follow His principles and laws if I want to come up with the right answer.

I thought I had things all figured out this week, and I was feeling pretty smug. God showed me that I have learned a lot about love. He is very pleased about that, but He is concerned about my continued trouble with the obvious. Love is the point of this journey, and doing the math will be required all along the way. I’m very grateful God provides all the help I need to find the right answers. The Holy Spirit is a terrific Tutor, and Christ is the Master when it comes to teaching. I know with Their help, I’ll be able to solve any problems that come my way and “do the math” with ease. It is nice to know that being in debt is a good thing when it comes to love.

Fear, Take a Hike!!

The peace of God can only be found in the present moment. He promises peace, but I lose it the moment I begin rehashing the past or rehearsing the future. I wrote about that in http://wp.me/p2G1u5-Ln, so I won’t rehash it now. God ended a difficult chapter last week and began a beautiful new one. I love a good ending, especially when it’s a surprise. The writer and reader in me loves leaving a chapter with a great feeling, and there’s nothing I like better than a new beginning. All endings lead to beginnings, and that was a big part of the learning this week.

I decided to rest instead of run this week, so peace caught up with my heart. I tore up the mountain in tears on Tuesday, but God brought me back down filled with the sweetest peace I’ve ever felt. I marvel at the difference in my before and after heart. I got something off my chest on that walk. I left the elephant that took up residence in my heart five years ago on top of that mountain. I came down feeling a thousand pounds lighter. Past regrets and future worries dissipated in God’s loving presence. His forgiveness gently lifted the weight of the world from my heart and left me transformed. I felt as though I had just lived through a year of Extreme Weight Loss in one hour. I literally jumped for joy because I was the me God created me to be.

Fear causes me to lose the peace God has in mind for me, and it was chasing love away. God made it clear that only love is able to cast out fear, and I had to choose whether or not to let it.

“There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love.” 1 John 4:18 (NASB)

God showed me the root of fear is a need for punishment, and He made it clear that He is tired of me wallowing in that need. He is not, and never has been, a God of punishment. He is, and always will be, a God of love. He knew only I could let go of my need to be punished and embrace the love in my path. Love does cast out fear, and that’s a lesson I lived and loved this week. God showed me I was surrounded by love, and that allowed me to put fear and punishment aside and let Him begin perfecting my heart. The Holy Spirit’s perfect love isn’t about being perfect. It is about getting rid of fear. Love perfects peace as soon as I tell fear to take a hike. I did just that with the help of a sweet loving friend this week, and it changed my heart in a beautiful way.

Love is the Way Out

I’ve never been nearer to God than when I walked up Indian Creek today. He made it clear that there are no endings or exits when it comes to love. Love is love, and that’s all there is to it. It isn’t something I can control or manage; it simply is. When Moses asked God His name, He replied “I AM WHO I AM” God is love, and there is nothing I, or anyone, can do about that.

Love doesn’t go away because it’s inconvenient. It doesn’t end because people change or grow apart. Circumstances do not change the nature of love, but the nature of love changes circumstances in a beautiful way. The surest sign of love is that there are no endings or exits, and that is taking some getting used to on my part. I begin looking for the exit as soon as I enter a building, and my heart does the same when I enter into a relationship. God showed me today that I can never deny or escape love.

Exits and endings are easy, and I’ve relied on them all my life. Love is not something from which I can escape; believe me, I’ve tried. Love is a gift from God and should never be taken for granted.  It is meant to be embraced with an open heart and cherished dearly because it is a piece of God’s own heart. It is the only thing worth holding on to in this world, and the only thing I can take with me into the next. 

Love will not be ignored, and it will not go away at my command. It becomes a part of who I am and cannot be separated from my being. Like the threads in a tapestry, love weaves itself into every aspect of my life. Unraveling a tapestry doesn’t make the thread go away, so God urged me today to leave the weaving in place and trust Him with the outcome. His outcomes are always better than my exits, so I plan to leave love in His hands and see where He takes my heart. I’ve done all the running away I plan to do in this life, and I’m no longer looking for a way out. Love is the way out.

Day of Reckoning or Time of Reconciliation?

Reconciliation“I reckon so” is a response used in the mountains indicating whatever asked makes sense based on what is known. Reckon means to calculate or figure, so it’s a fairly literal use of the term. It all adds up, so to speak. I’m not an accountant, but I did work as a bookkeeper for four years. I was uncomfortable balancing books, but I was ecstatic when the monthly reconciliation came out correctly. Seeing that sweet zero balance made me shout “Hallelujah!”

The lessons this week have been difficult ones that left me completely spent in more ways than one. I kept the girls last night, so I was in bed by 8:30. After they drifted off to sleep, I asked God for comfort and direction. God knew my heart was the problem. As soon as I think I’ve found some balance when it comes to my heart, the rug is invariably pulled out from under me. Roller coasters, merry-go-rounds, and yo yo’s are fun, but my heart doesn’t belong on any of them. It’s exciting to be lifted up and down; but when the ride stops, so does the fun. Being drawn near is thrilling, but being pushed away is so terribly chilling. My heart was as tired as it’s ever been this week. God saw my emptiness, but He was waiting for me to ask for help.

I did ask, and God was faithful to answer. I didn’t ask earlier because I feared a day of reckoning was coming. I’ve seen God as a Smiter most of my life, but I’ve learned nothing is farther from the truth. I suppose my upbringing caused me to think of Him in that way, but He made it clear the balancing He had in mind for my heart need not be feared. His sweet Spirit showed me truths that helped bring the zero balance I needed. So many things just weren’t adding up in my heart, but I kept pretending all was well. I knew where the problems were, but I didn’t know how to fix them. I had a flashback to personnel and payroll and had to smile when I thought of Joanna, a CPA, who would always come and patiently help me find my mistakes. The Holy Spirit was very like her as He sat with me last night and this afternoon.

Knowing what needs to be fixed and fixing it are very different things, but I know I’ll find the courage to move forward with God’s help. He knows the pain love can bring when it isn’t returned. He also knows that making someone love me is never the right way. He could make everyone love Him, but He doesn’t dare. He knows that only leaves the heart empty and hurting. Hearts need truth to bring them into balance, and the truth has never been harder to hear than this week. It’s always my choice whether or not to hear the truth. I knew what I was going to hear before I heard it, and that’s what “I reckon so” is all about. It is a way of coming around to what I may not want but know is right based on the obvious.

A dear friend told me as we walked today that my heart was worn out. She said I was emotionally empty, and it was affecting my health. She was genuinely concerned about me. My sister told me the same thing during my visit with her over the weekend. Both touched my heart where it needed to be touched and helped me find the courage to ask God for help. My heart is worn out, and that zero balance is hurting right now. I know God will bring renewal as I close the books on past hurts, stop trying to change what I cannot change, and begin anew. It is what reconciliation is all about.

A day of reckoning is “a time of punishment or retribution: a time when somebody is made to answer for crimes or mistakes.”  Reconciliation is “the process of making consistent or compatible.” I like the sound of consistent and compatible but realize I’ve been drowning in punishment and retribution my entire life. I’ve made many mistakes when it comes to my heart, but God knows I’ve punished myself far too much for far too long. I don’t have to answer for any crimes, and I’ve certainly paid for my mistakes and more. 

Pain is part of reconciliation, and no one knows that better than God. His innocent Son died to bring the world’s heart into balance. I pray, with the help of His Holy Spirit, I will make stop making choices that break my heart and start making ones that heal and help. A zero balance is terribly painful when it comes to love, but every ending is a wonderful opportunity to begin again. There are no easy paths when it comes to love, but there are clear choices based upon the truth that make the heart’s journey a joyous one.

2 Corinthians 5:18-19 gives me the courage to see that zero balance with an attitude of anticipation rather than fear.

“Now all these things are from God, who reconciled us to Himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation, namely, that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and He has committed to us the word of reconciliation”